Lipservice: The DIY Sex Talk Tool
A sex therapy communication guide for partners looking to rekindle their excitement and passion by developing sex positive habits.
REDISCOVER EACH OTHER
EXPLORE DESIRE & FANTASY
We had gone a while without sex—by far our longest dry spell. We both knew we had to do something about it—but we didn't know how to start talking about it. We thought about sex therapy but it was expensive. Then we found Lipservice... And I have to say it was a little awkward at first, but we were having fun anyway. But by the time we got to the Sensate Focus exercise—well in the name of modesty I'll just say: we broke the seal.
A relationship communication guide—designed by a sex therapist
Communication is hard!
You have one person with all their history...
and another person with all their history...
on top of that, all their shared history...
And that's a whole lot of complex context all tangled together.
Mix in the stress of daily life. And financial concerns. Quarantine fatigue. Kids, career, anxiety, aging...
Then bend it all through the lens of two (or more) unique perspectives—and it truly is a wonder that any relationship survives beyond that first stage of magnetic passion and exhilarating attraction.
So what's the solution?
Sex therapy is for lovers
Sex therapy and relationship coaching can be very effective for working through complex problems and strategizing growth together.
But therapy can be time consuming. And expensive, if not covered by insurance. Plus—what if you don't jibe with your therapist??
Look: although I think everyone would benefit from professional sexuality coaching—I understand the practicalities of life. So that's why I developed this DIY communication guide and microcourse to help people jumpstart their own relationship communication—right at home.
Valerie McDonnell (aka SexTherapistRVA)
Lipservice is a workpack of proven sex therapy techniques & exercises to help you build better communication habits.
4 pillars of sexual communication
Refocusing on what you appreciate about your partner. What makes them special & important.
Listen first. Empathy next. Then more empathy. Talk your way through what makes you you.
How it works. How it doesn't. How to talk about it as it ebbs and flows through life.
From ritualized non-sexual touching, to expressing hidden fantasies—some talk is tactile.
4 weeks of actionable strategy
It couldn't be simpler. You've already done the hard part. You've already decided it's worthwhile working on your relationship.
Download the guide
Print the PDF or type right in the file
Work through the activities and discussions together
When the 4 weeks are through, repeat any or all, as desired
Lipservice isn't a silver bullet. It's a framework for setting your intention and getting to work. It's a map to better communication—but you still have to take the journey.
Lipservice FREE download includes:
-Fun weekly worksheets
-Solo and partner activities
-Mindfulness journaling prompts
-Guided sexuality discussions
-Sensual exploration exercises
-Exclusive access to educational materials
Plus periodic emails from me with check-ins, challenges, and bonus resources.
If you can't keep the 4-week schedule, just use the emails to work at your own pace.
We've done some relationship therapy before, so some of the stuff was familiar. But therapy is talk talk talk. Lipservice is do, do, do. Really good for action-minded people like my husband who has no interest in talking about his parents.
Ok so why is it free?
Because I love you!
Also because my business centers around more in-depth coaching. In my one-on-one and group sessions, I help people explore their sexuality and get more in touch with each other's fears and desires.
That may or may not be something you need right now.
But no matter who you are or where you are in the relationship journey—we all have room to improve our communication and empathy. And we all have the right to express ourselves and our sexuality as they are—not as someone else thinks they should be.
For that we need to talk about it.